The Mattress Queen Won’t Be Ignored

May 22, 2015

The Mattress Queen keeps making an appearance on my Facebook feed. The mainstream media and the Sisters of Outrage love to spread accusations of rape, even ones that have been proven bogus. 

Stephanie Hallett of Ms. Magazine hailed Emma Sulkowicz as a brave heroine and one of the greatest things to happen to feminists in 2014. Sulkowicz made herself famous by claiming she was raped. And then made herself even more famous by hauling a mattress around campus, publicly shaming a fellow feminist for allegedly raping her.

Despite there being no evidence of rape and lots of evidence that Emma was a jilted lover seeking payback, the Stephanie Halletts of the world still maintain that Sulkowicz is a model citizen and have made no effort to apologize to her falsely-accused/publicly-shamed victim.          

Another feminist blogger at New York Magazine is outraged because the president of Columbia University wouldn’t shake hands with Emma. Perhaps, he was afraid that she would accuse him of raping her hand?

I’ll be honest, I didn’t follow the story all that much. Even though it was shoved in my face by the media. I only started to write about these stories, because of my BPD-ex. I am fascinated only because I want to understand why it became the focal point of her whole life. I have since learned that false accusations are normal for the abnormal- that 1% of the female population that loves to tell stories of rape, incest and boogie men.

I have also learned that many of these women experienced sexual abuse in their childhood. It is those memories that cause dissociation, lapse of good judgement and false accusations. Triggered memories of childhood abuse can cause the person to misinterpret events, especially if they involve intense emotions.

Stephanie Hallett has made a career out of praising troubled women through the lens of victimhood. She has yet to write any articles about mental illness. And that puzzles me. How can you write about women who show signs of emotional instability, the kind that makes you accuse a man of rape when he rejects you, and not write about the cause of such troubling behavior?

Those who don’t understand why a woman would falsely accuse a man of rape, don’t understand the nature of mental illness. They don’t understand BPD and the pain that comes with rejection. They don’t understand that rejection makes them do crazy things like accuse you of rape or anything else that might cast them as the victim. Imagine feeling so much pain (from rejection) that the only way you can describe it is by telling people that you were anally raped.

Fortunately, I’ve never had such accusations hurled at me. Lord knows I’ve been with women who were crazy enough to make such accusations. But I do know what it feels like to have a former lover turn 180 on you for inexplicable reasons. I know what it feels like to go from the love of their life to public enemy number one. I have had troubled women accuse me of abuse because how dare I accuse them of having mental issues?

On some level, I think the Mattress Queen believes she was raped. Troubled women believe their own delusions. They believe the world is out to get them. Had the accused been just another one night stand (one of many), he might have escaped Emma’s wrath. But he made the mistake of getting emotionally involved with an emotionally unstable woman.

He was lured by sex, but didn’t realize that these women use it as a tool to punish men. Their ambivalent feelings about sex are the result of childhood trauma. It has left them with an insatiable appetite for sex, but also an insatiable appetite for destroying that which they desire.

You should never judge a book by its cover. Even if that book has purple/blue hair or whatever look is fashionable with the identity-disturbance crowd these days. But you should always look beyond the carefully-fashioned image that is created by people who love attention just a little too much. People who carry mattresses are also carrying emotional baggage. If you look closely you can see it. It is plain as day. 

People who praise people who carry mattresses are also carrying emotional baggage. They are carrying the burden of proof. They are constantly re-writing the narrative to bring legitamcy to their tales of victimhood. Unfortunately, women like Stephanie Hallett keep cherry-picking stories of victimization that later turn out to be false.  So instead of lending credence to her own narrative, it only serves to create doubt.

Borderline women use the law as a weapon and they use their womanhood as a shield. But the law is onto them. Cases like this are often thrown out because of a lack of evidence and a history of attention-seeking/chaos manufacturing.

These women are out to prove that all men are pigs, and then can’t fathom why they are constantly being rejected. They offer men the promise of wild sex and can’t figure out why men use them for sex. They run away from good men and can’t figure out why they end up with the male version of themselves.  Stephanie Hallett can’t figure out why the only publication that will employ her is one that doesn’t insist on fact-checking or doesn’t frown upon pseudo-journalism. And Emma Sulkowicz is left wondering, “Why, oh why won’t the president of the prestigious university shake my hand???”

Despite being cleared of wrongdoing, this poor guy’s reputation is tarnished for life. His name smeared across national headlines. He may even re-think his position on feminism. “Feminists” like Emma Sulkowicz and Stephanie Hallett will go on blindly lashing out at MANkind, because they aren’t really fighting for women’s rights. They are fighting inner demons… fighting a past they can not accept.

I know what it’s like to suddenly realize the woman you’re with is batshit crazy. And in that moment, she too will realize that you know too much. She may even sense your justifiable concern and interpret it as rejection. She may even pretend she is rejecting your advances in retaliation. If she feels reallly hurt, she will go so far as to find a way to dehumanize you… portray you as a predator. She will do everything except address her own issues or accept responsibility for her illness.

It is much easier to paint a picture of victimization… paint you as the devil. This is about her victimhood. Not yours. Feminists like Stephanie Hallett never write about falsely-accused men, even ones who are feminists themselves. To write about a man’s victimhood would reveal too much about their disease and that would defeat the purpose of the dog and pony show. 

9 Responses to “The Mattress Queen Won’t Be Ignored”

  1. OC said

    This victimhood-as-identity shit is also inherently antifeminist because it demands women be weak and powerless in order to have their opinions taken seriously, but hey. That’s none of my business.

  2. chump said

    They believe themselves angels but, having no wings they spread their legs.

    • savorydish said

      Hah. Spot on. It is funny how quickly she dropped the charges after we found out she was not the angel she pretended to be.

      • Amen to this article, and the comments I’ve read so far. You know @Savory this is just a sick world we live in now ! Wow this article brings back memories of when I had the Ahh Haa moment and went through the truma with the person I came in contact with . I consider myself fully recovered , but I can still see the beast that lives in her . It’s sad man . To me it’s a shame . To have to live that way with hate in your heart for people who unexpectedly just want to love and share with them ! Again great article . And again wow I can see everything you explained here happening to me !

  3. Marie said

    Savory Dish,
    It is possible to be a feminist but love men (that’s me). I had to be independent and live on my own to escape my BPD mother. She tried to teach me that all men were pigs but I refused to drink that Kool-Aid. I think any woman who hates men should stay away from them. A big red flag is a woman who hates all men I don’t care how beautiful she is or what skills she has.
    Thanks for this article it was enlightening!

    • savorydish said

      You are living proof that a feminist can love men. I don’t think anyone here intends to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

      Feminism is not the problem. The problem is feminism has been infiltrated and corrupted by emotionally-damaged extremists aka Man Haters.

      You would think if they hate men so much they would stay away from men. But that is how screwed up they are. They can’t stay away from men. They need them for validation. They need them for sex. Fall in love with one and she will have sex with every other guy in the neighborhood.

      My BPD-ex treated her female lovers just as poorly, so I hesitate to call her a feminist. Her feminist image is just another construct… a carefully staged act. She uses her rape narrative to attract sympathy and recruit angry women. This is a narcissist at work. Not a feminist.

      She intends to use feminism to elevate her status from broken woman to queen of martyrdom. But the reality is she is just a sad, self-destructive person. And anyone who is caught in her mushroom cloud will surely be consumed by her hate.

      Feminism should be about self-love. Women like my BPD-ex are driven by self-hate and the hatred of men.

  4. The Community of the Wrongly Accused has covered Sulkowicz and others like her:

    False accusations of rape are social nuclear weapons. The best action the judicial system could take that even comes close to justice for the falsely accused is to have false accusers serve the same amount of prison time the accused would serve if convicted.
    As it stands now, men get prison and women get “therapy.”

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