Putting the blog behind me was my way of moving forward, but sadly I have not escaped my problems. Troubled people continue to disrupt my life. I didn’t really have a need to post for a while… until today.

It was suppose to be a Happy Thanksgiving, but things took an unpleasant turn. My sister was coming into town. And in the spirit of the holiday season, I invited my ex to join us. She really liked my sister and my family, so I thought she might enjoy it.

Although we are no longer together, we had been exchanging pleasant texts for the last couple of weeks and she mentioned she was not flying home for the holidays.

So I invited her because I didn’t want her to be alone for the holidays. Although, I did so with some hesitation… and for good reason. I never know how she’s going to react.

Boy, was that a mistake. It was an act of kindness that was not well-received.
Apparently, I’m an asshole for inviting her to share Thanksgiving dinner with us.

To say she did not react well is an understatement. She lashed out at me with all she had. The pleasant texts were forgotten and she split me black once again, as she had done periodically in our relationship.

A week ago, we were reminiscing about a restaurant we had gone to but now was permanently closed. Fast forward a week later, and she claims she wants nothing to do with me.

Although she has said that before. I can’t even count the number of times she told me never to contact her again. And then a week later, she is in my bed again.

All she had to do was say “no thank you”, and I would have been perfectly fine with it. But she used it as an opportunity to blame me for everything that went wrong in the relationship. It is not in her character to say she missed me so. It hurts her pride.

Saying how I ruined everything was her way of telling me she missed me. She was too proud to say how much she loved me, so instead she told me how much I hurt her and treated her like shit.

Which couldn’t be further from the truth. Because if it were true she wouldn’t have come back to me over and over again for two years. Her friends wouldn’t have told her that they’ve never seen her happier.

But the stories change when troubled women slip into devaluation mode… when they are desperately trying to emotionally detach themselves. Suddenly, the friends that said they’ve never seen her happier, now say they can’t stand me. This is according to my jaded ex.

Whenever she splits me black, she forgets all the nice things I do for her. She forgets why she keeps coming back to me. She conveniently forgets many things… when it’s convenient for her.

Once again, she accused me of sleeping with my neighbor. Not because it was true, but because she was always threatened by her. And once she gets something in her mind, it is impossible to change it. She is obsessed with cheating because her last ex and her father were both cheaters. So therefore, I must be a cheater.

The funny thing is she claims she is still good friends with her ex and things have never been better with her father- the abusive drunk father she claimed threw her out of the house because he didn’t like the guy she was dating.

So if her life has always been filled with abusive men, then why am I the only one she shuts out on a regular basis? She claims the difference is she loves me. And yet she will deny that she is afraid of intimacy.

If I suggest that she has serious issues or remind her of her traumatic past, she accuses me of being abusive. The past is too painful for her. So when I remind her of it, she attributes the pain to me. Because it’s easier to blame me than her family.

Oh, this is the best part- she later accuses me of harassment and threatens to file a complaint because the fight she started has now become too much for her to handle.

But this was always the pattern- She would start a fight (aka baiting). But when I respond to HER hostility, she would accuse me of being abusive. When I accuse her of acting crazy, she accuses me of being crazy.

Doesn’t everybody react to being invited to Thanksgiving dinner with hostility and vindictive rage?

This is the sick game she plays and I am a sucker for thinking she will change. She and her therapist claim she doesn’t have BPD. But yet she takes all her games out of the BPD playbook.

She even let it slip out that she was sleeping with another man. This was payback for all the imaginary women she thought I was sleeping with.
No, that’s not a borderline personality at all.

Denial is strong with women who had alcoholic fathers. At least, the ones I’ve known. They grew up with it. So do not expect them to accept criticism lightly. Trust me, they will remember. They will pull out a laundry list of grievances and read it to you as they push you out of the plane.

Troubled women play the push and pull game until the day they find an easy replacement. They just need someone to keep them warm on those cold lonely nights. Any body will do.

It is always important for these woman to feel like they are rejecting you and not the other way around. So they will sneak back into your life after you break up with them, just so they can say they broke up with you. Troubled women are that petty.