Trouble Dealing with Rejection

March 31, 2014

Faithful readers know that I recently broke up with someone. And that person then blocked all contact. Not cool. The amusing part was that she accused me of not being able to handle rejection. Whaaaat?

Ummm, I seem to recall that I was the one that broke up with her. Anyways, there was no point arguing who broke up with whom. I just laughed.

I laughed because the same thing happened years ago when I told my borderline ex I would not move to LA with her. And she told me the same exact thing. LOL. She got everyone else to believe her too.

Who has a problem dealing with rejection? Who has a problem with intimacy? Who pushes people away when they get too close? Who blocks and runs at the first sign of rejection? Who loves the attention and the drama? Who has a problem with just being friends?

Are you sure it’s me?

27 Responses to “Trouble Dealing with Rejection”

  1. jhan1969 said

    They can’t take being rejected, so they project it back onto you. Classic move. Psychology 101.

    Of course, they’ll do anything to make SURE you eventually reject them – which fulfills their fear of being ‘abandoned.’

    Tragic Irony.

    Yawn. Get the popcorn.

    😉

  2. danley said

    Projection

  3. danley said

    She doesn’t wanna own all those miserable traits, feelings, and thoughts. So….she does what she knows best….
    Projection

    • savorydish said

      That’s exactly what she is doing. But there’s more. She wants to be on top. In control. The dumper. Not the dumpee. Love is a power play for her.

      • jhan1969 said

        If she’s in control, then she can’t be abandoned.

        This stuff is to textbook, it almost bores me.

        😉 😉

      • savorydish said

        Exactly. Anything to lessen the pain of abandonment. It’s all about damage control.

      • savorydish said

        And every time I caught her doing this I pointed it out. Analyzed the shit out of her. It drove her nuts that I would not engage. She accused me of being emotionally detached. But that was the
        point.

  4. Mary said

    Wow. Ur blog. Should have guessed. Yes, u rejected me. Big whop. U made Ur choice & I simply tired of Ur BPD antics. U r free 2 use someone else. We all make choices in our lives and I’ve simply accepted urs. Hey, U should celebrate! I threw in the towel on u! I recognized u didn’t have the balls to talk to me again offline so I said so long. Man, how many blogs do u have? And how many identities have u created? U ever consider trying 2 be REAL…the man behind all the masks is not so bad with gifts galore. Ur inability to recognize that is a huge part of the problem…as well as Ur choice to live more online than in real life. Enjoy the latest g/f. She must be so H*O*T. Priorities. ..lol. Must be rough settling.

  5. Mary said

    FyI: b4 I unsubscribe, let’s get at least this straight. We r not friends so there is no reason fir me to ever communicate with u again. U used me online and I have said ‘enough.’ Again, celebrate ur choice; U should be very happy I gave up on u. Nice blog. I won’t read it again! Now u have NO access to me whatsoever. Again, celebrate Ur win.

    • savorydish said

      Who are you talking to? Are you out of your mind? I’m not the guy you spent six years with and I don’t have multiple blogs. But please do unsubscribe. Yikes. I can see why he ran away.

    • Marie said

      Mary,
      If you can’t write your words out then you are doing us ALL a favor by unsubscribing. Also, Savory Dish is not the man you think he is. Go to DBT therapy and if you are already in it please double or triple up on it.

      • savorydish said

        Thanks, Marie. Well said. It cracks me up because wasn’t she the one telling us we needed to be more tolerant of borderlines?

      • Marie said

        Is it the SAME Mary?! Wow! Talk about multiple personalities! That’s like a complete and total change from “I’m glad I had my relationship, I learned so much. It was worth the time I spent with him online”. Cuckoo!

      • savorydish said

        Haha. Someone either needs medication or needs to cut back. I dunno.

      • Marie said

        Even the writing style is different! Definitely missed some pills for like a week or so. Oh my goodness. I hope she unsubscribed. “And I dreamt he was sitting on my bed holding my hand and I was gently touching his face….I knew it was the end and I was ok”….BS. She’s so mad now she doesn’t even have time to write words out completely.

      • savorydish said

        lol. We just witnessed a whole new level of crazy.

      • Marie said

        Yup, it’s the same one. Direct quote cut and pasted “I have lived with pain for years. Now I shall simply live with loss. Over time we each heal. Eventually I will trust enough again to allow another in. I do not regret my experiences with a person who has BPD; there were many positives. I am a better person because of him. Even he wouldn’t believe that, but it’s true.”
        So in reality, she thought YOU were him all along?! That is incredible. What happened to no regrets?
        Whole new level of crazy and beyond!
        Hugs and if I were you….although I don’t advocate abusing alcohol….have 1 drink. I would join you but it’s Lent and I gave up alcohol for Lent even though I only indulge a few times a year.

      • savorydish said

        Hah. I needed a good laugh. I could definitely sense there was something off about her but at least she was being polite. But then she went over the edge for no reason. The scary part is she thinks she is the normal one.

    • savorydish said

      First you come here chastising everyone here for not being more tolerant of BPs and then you flip out on me thinking that I’m some BP guy you had an online relationship with for six years. What is wrong with YOU?

  6. Marie said

    You have got to love how the BPs have their own reality. Laughter is a good response to it!

  7. niceguy said

    Well ive just come on and im thinkin”wtf”im off to bed,,c u folks later,have fun,lol

    • savorydish said

      I actually thought she was talking to you, because she initially posted her comment under yours. I wonder what triggered that reaction?

      • jhan1969 said

        This is awesome. We COULD be drawn into an emotional vortex, but we’re coolly sitting back and talking about triggers.

        Does anyone not see what this is? It’s a DEFLECTED FEEDING. A borderline came here to ‘feed’ on you emotionally, and you kung-fu’d it. Now you’re calmly sitting back and observing.

        You batted that insect away. Which means you’re getting better.

      • savorydish said

        Hah. I guess that makes me a Kung fu master.

  8. Allie said

    …I don’t mean to be rude, but surely there are mentally intact women out there, but you seem to always be drawn into dysfunctional relationships?

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