Revisionist History

February 22, 2011

Every now and then I look at my stats to see where traffic is coming from, and I click on sites to see where they lead. One of my clicks lead me to this little bit of revisionist history by Shady O’Doyle:

The alarming thing, however, is that he’s already grooming another woman for this abuse. Her name is “Skye” and he’s writing things about how she’s a good abuse survivor, a good person with BPD, she’s a nice obedient enlightened girl who apologizes when she does something bad, she’s the only one he likes. She’s in a vulnerable situation, and he’s creating trust between them. So that she’ll like him enough to get closer to him.

I wonder if Skye knows that I’m grooming her for abuse. lol. I didn’t even realize I was capable of such evil. But if Shady says so, it must be true. So according to Shady’s (fuzzy) logic- if I’m nice to a woman, I must be trying to lure her into my underground dungeon. Somebody better warn Skye!!! I think Shady has watched Silence of the Lambs one too many times. Either that or what we are witnessing is the paranoia and misandry that sometimes comes with being an untreated survivor of an abusive father. Or we are witnessing a desperate woman. A woman who is so afraid of losing her following, she is willing to resort to the lowest common denominator.

Shady is upset that I demanded an apology from her. So rather than admit that she’s wrong, she slams Skye for apologizing to men she has wronged. Suggesting Skye is a weak-willed woman, who is “vulnerable” to my amazing trust-building skills. Notice how Shady positions herself (a bitchy woman who doesn’t have the courage to own up to her misdeeds) as the gold standard in womanhood. And then looks down upon someone like Skye who has the balls to take responsibility for, not only her own well-being, but the well-being of others. I think this little post of hers says more about Shady’s character than mine or Skye’s.

Skye has more courage than all of Shady and Co combined. She has been through the same abuse that Shady complains about, but look at the difference. Skye has not only accepted the fact that she has BPD, she is working hard to beat her disorder. Meanwhile a coward like Shady spends all her time attacking people she doesn’t even know in an effort to make her look the like the victim/hero and to sell more crappy t-shirts. No wonder she can only get troubled teens to follow her. What a great role model she is!

This post seems to have been written about a week ago, and things have calmed down since then. The “war”is over, but I can’t let this one slide. Cowards like Shady and my ex need to be called out for bullshit like this. They call themselves feminists but yet look down on fellow feminists. They use activism as a way to legitimize their unresolved and untreated rage. They are troubled women looking for trouble. Antagonizing people and then claiming they are being victimized by the people they antagonized.

She accuses me of manipulating a woman who is much more strong-willed than Shady will ever be. While Skye is confronting her past, Shady is living comfortably in denial. She belittles Skye, but she does it to flatter her own ego. Shady is very good at spinning a story and twisting the facts. She is a master revisionist. And her followers are gullible enough to eat it all up. Her followers are too stupid to realize Shady is exploiting them- the young, naive and emotionally damaged. They listen because she tells them what they want to hear. She tells them it’s ok to be a horrible human being as long as you’ve been victimized. If this doesn’t pull the cover off her scam, then clearly there is a sucker born every minute.

I hope you’re proud of yourself, Shady.

21 Responses to “Revisionist History”

  1. savorydish said

    So I guess the point of Shady’s blog is that she’s the model woman. And we should all bow in her presence. We should also allow her to abuse us, never to respond or complain.

  2. savorydish said

    I love how these people equate being a bitch with being empowered. Bitchy people are compensating for their insecurities and low self-esteem. These are cowards in wolf clothing.

  3. savorydish said

    The most disturbing thing is she is sending out a message that acting out and lashing out is cool. But taking responsibility for your behavior is lame. The young girls she’s sending this message out to are screwed up as it is, but she is making it worse. She’s basically saying it’s ok to be unhinged and untreated. I hope her mother is reading this.

  4. savorydish said

    See how she abuses the word “abuser”. This is an abuser projecting their abusive tendencies. She is taking the spotlight of her own abusive behavior. She uses this word to put down opposition. Anybody who dares to point out THEIR abusive behavior is an abuser. How convenient. Much like George W. Bush questioning people’s patriotism when they questioned his decisions. Much like Sen. Joe McCarthy accusing people of being commies.

  5. savorydish said

    Shady seems awfully concerned about a woman’s choice to choose abortion. But then she belittles a woman who has made a choice to make her life better. Can somebody explain this contradiction to me?

  6. savorydish said

    Dictators lose power when they attack their own.

  7. savorydish said

    Shady has demonstrated that she is a bitter, petty, jealous, insecure, sorry excuse for a feminist and a woman.

    • Evan said

      Now, responding to Sady and Garland and their nonsense for me is ace. I think they have strong beliefs, in some cases illogical beliefs by any measure, but otherwise it’s misandry disguised as shit-stirrers disguised as activists diguised as feminists. They will maybe make bad politicians one day. Positively they draw the spotlight on important issues such as women’s right to access to abortion, and petition strongly. That’s vital work in my view. But at the end of the day they strike me as careerists and flamers. They seem to enjoy the drama of it all more then making real progress and support for victims of abuse and others. Running around identifying ‘Trolls’ and flaming them. Don’t agree with someone Sady? Defeat them with logic in a public debate. But I don’t think that’s flamboyant enough is it? But I’ve already said all this before.

      SD, again I don’t have a lot of time to get into it in detail but in summary:-

      You wrote an article about rape in context with the common behaviour patterns of people with BPD. It was going to draw a lot of angry responses from victims of rape. After you wrote the article I said that I did not agree with your points about how people with BPD place themselves in places of danger and how this could lead to rape. I wasn’t disagreeing that ppl with BPD place themselves in danger, it was that your article could be interpreted that these ppl with BPD somehow brought the rape upon themselves. I know that wasn’t your meaning. But this is the principle reason why I believe that you began receiving so many hateful emails. Unless consent is given it doesn’t matter what the circumstances are. Maybe some of these ppl have personality disorders, your dx over the internet is unsound, but most were probably pissed off because they (incorrectly) saw your article as a type of apology for rape, the old ‘she was dressed skimpily and was looking for it’ bullshit type scenario arguement. I know thats not what you were saying, but I believe thats how they interpreted it. As former partners of women with BPD we witnessed the behaviour over a long period of time. Part of that behaviour is their constant lying. About practically everything. Lie about something bad about yourself because it’s still attention seeking. I’m not not saying my exbpd lied about all the horrible things. But she lied about so much what bits do I know are true? AND YES, not all men and women with BPD are the same. There are levels of severity, as well as the other factors that can contribute.

      Then you did two things. You didn’t post their emails. Fair enough. If it involves someone telling you to die horribly posting it serves no purpose. But then you responded one-way to their emails. It served little purpose as a reader of the blog. I think maybe a better response could have been to (as you did at one point later) respond in general to all of the emails you were receiving, summarising their nature, reiterating the points you were trying to make in the initial article on rape/BPD.

      And now you’re at the end of a flaming war. The flamers believe you’re apologising for rapists. Wrong. You believe that a lot of these ppl are exhibiting symptoms that “suggest a personality disorder”. Unsound. You’re as likely to change all their minds, as they are to recruit you to TigerBeatOff.

      Nothing of the above is intentioned in any way as a personal attack on you. Just the hurried keystrokes of an grumpy old man lol

      • savorydish said

        Evan,

        We don’t always agree but I always respect your opinions, because you are always fair. I like the fact that you don’t always take my side, because I do want people to engage in debate. But as you have demonstrated it can be done with respect and humanity. Maybe this does come with maturity. So I thank you for giving us your take on things. Trust doesn’t come easy for me anymore, but you, Miss K and Skye have earned it.

        You’ll be happy to know it has been a quiet day as far as comments go. As I suspected, the stragglers have lost their steam. They realize their efforts have been counterproductive. They know it makes them look worse than me. I know I won’t change their minds, but I think have the ability to get in their heads. They lash out because that is their conditioned reaction to things they find unpleasant. But I still believe there is part of them that is listening. They wouldn’t react so strongly if they weren’t. The angry comments have subsided, but the traffic still continues at a healthy rate. That means they are sticking around to read. The beast has cooled down and now they are digesting the material at their leisure.

        I’m not looking to convert anyone, but I think there needs to be a voice that counters theirs. They are strong in numbers. But I like to think you and I have truth on our side. But then again, maybe I’m just argumentative.

        Ultimately, this blog is about seeking justice for what my ex did to me. You and I have been wronged. And what keeps me going is this foolish desire for me to right this wrong. I know you don’t approve of all my methods, but I always try to fight fair. I don’t mind the attacks from the mob, because you and I both know they’re rubbish. Even so, it’s still important for me to fight back. To set the record straight. Again, this might just be the piss and vinegar in me.

      • Evan said

        There’s no winners in any bpd rship where no treatment is being sought. They’re doomed to continue to struggle with must be the worst mental disorder. There’s no coincidence that BPD has the highest rate of suicide of all mental illnesses or disorders. We have to pick up what’s left of our lives afterwards and deal with the hurricane of post bpd rship wrath. But we can process the anger, process the abuse, and the rest, learn from it, maybe let it teach us something. And move on better ppl. Justice? Do you feel your exbpd needs to pay for what she’s done to you? What would justice consist of?

      • savorydish said

        I agree with all your sentiments. My justice comes in the form of this blog. Everything here is the whole truth and nothing but the truth. You know that. I know that. And on some level she knows that. She knows it’s here. She reads it. It is available for all to see. I can’t stop her from spreading lies about me or thinking badly of me. But I can counter her disordered behavior with the truth. It won’t change her, but it puts my soul at ease. This blog has allowed me to process all those feelings and more.

        While I’ve been busy writing and healing, she has been trying to distract herself with work, nonsense and marriage. She has not given herself time to process anything. She is a silent rager which means she keeps her troubles bottled up. It affects her soul, her mind and even her body.
        While she remains in denial, I am slowly shedding off the weight of the past. My conscience has been cleared while her conscience will continue to haunt her. Every article on BPD I have dug up confirms my suspicions and my righteousness.

        I know her conscience is bothering her because I know her. Recruiting proxies was her way of eliciting more sympathy. Whenever her conscience bothers her, she looks for people to pat her on the head- “There there poor waif, we’ll make the bad man go away.” But this blog reminds all of them that this is all bullshit and self-delusions. False accusations and mind games. Call it a disorder, call it trauma, call it whatever you like. It’s all bullshit. This blog is here to point that out.

        These posts have given me clarity. While she continues to entangle herself with lies. Eventually her conscience will catch up with her. And that will be justice served. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but I’ve had two women call me to apologize for the way they treated me. One was my first girlfriend and the second was a girl I went on one date with. I called them both out for their bullshit as well. Like I’ve said, I’ve been dating troubled girls my whole life. They both called a year later and thanked me for telling them what they needed to hear. The first one got help, the second one sounded like she was more self-aware. Will this last one do the same? I won’t hold my breath. But this is why I believe what I’m doing is right. Telling the truth is my form of justice.

      • Evan said

        Meant to add at the end of my last post, I’m not challenging your beliefs or actions for the hell of it. Just giving my opinion just like yourself. We don’t have to always agree, that’s life, and frankly it would be very boring if we did. Why, it might be like the congoline of kissasses on Sady and Garland’s blogs. I’m going to have to stop reading those. Mind pollution.

      • savorydish said

        lol. congo line is a good way to describe those lemmings. no worries, even if you were challenging me. I need to be challenged. it helps me figure things out. the last thing I want to be is another Shady and Garland.

      • savorydish said

        “Positively they draw the spotlight on important issues such as women’s right to access to abortion, and petition strongly. That’s vital work in my view. ”

        I like to give credit where credit is due. The TigerBeaters do some good in the world. How much of it is for show is debatable. But I do agree that activism is vital. True activism is important. I have written about activism in the past, not as a criticism of activism, but criticism of its abuse.

        But I think the blame is once again on personality disorders. PDs have a way of twisting even the purest of institutions. Look at what’s going on with the Catholic church. PDs are everywhere- the media, government, religion etc. This is why awareness of PDs is so important. As a society we need to be able to sort the good from the bad. This not just about personal relationships. PDs have a profound effect on society. You look at what’s going on in the Middle East. That’s not just about politics. These are countries that have been ruled for decades by charismatic but evil PDs- narcissists and sociopaths.

        We’re not talking about people who are huddled in a fetal position. High-function PDs infiltrate society, they seek out positions of authority and influence. My ex is a perfect example. She writes for a major feminist magazine. Thousands of young and impressionable women are listening to a woman who is an emotional mess. This is the danger of online communities like Tigerbeatdown. They are spreading their disease over the internet.

        I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. These people need to save themselves before they decide they’re going to save the world.

  8. savorydish said

    The Desperate are full of laughable accusations and misrepresentations. They characterize me as a misogynist and an abuser.

    So why oh why would I choose to spend 8 months with a woman who is a militant feminist? Why would a misogynist fall in love with a feminist?

    Surely, there are easier women to groom for abuse. These labels they have bestowed upon me lack any basis in reality. They are merely go-to attacks that they use for anyone who questions their motives. The more they use these silly labels, the less power they have. These fauxminists are stripping themselves of power and influence.

  9. savorydish said

    Hold on Evan,

    Now you’re misinterpreting my words.
    It’s 2-3%. Which doesn’t sound like a lot, but that’s a number in the millions. When I say they’re everywhere, I don’t mean they constitute a large percentage of the population. I mean they live amongst us. They’re not locked up in an asylum somewhere, they could be teachers, lawyers, and even doctors.

    For the record, I’ve never said all victims of abuse have PDs. What i said was abuse is very common amongst PDs. Trauma is usually what triggers BPD. I stated all that in my controversial post, but it is a fact.

    Am I saying that all trauma survivors have BPD? No. Am I saying that all the TigerBeaters have BPD or trauma? No.

    I call’em as they come. That’s not hypersensitivity. That’s being aware of obvious signs. If someone sends death threats my way, obviously something is not right in their head. Right?

    • Evan said

      Yes there are millions of ppl with mental health problems. Yes they are mostly not in asylums (partly coz our enlightend leaders shut most of them down last century, sending them home with some money and meds. Most of them ended up as homeless). The vast majority of mentally ill ppl don’t need to be in asylums. They lead very normal lives. They are teachers who are depressed, bankers with anxiety, builders with bipolar. We don’t have a society where these ppl need to be kept in check. If they fall ill they get taken to the hospital. If they break the law they go to court. Just like you and me.

      • savorydish said

        I saw a documentary on One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. The doc basically suggested that the movie was the reason mental health institutions became so unpopular. But politicians being politicians shut them down, instead of reforming the system. As you said, this is the reason why most cities have huge populations of homeless people. I wouldn’t even go so far as lumping PDs with the mentally ill. Especially the high-functioning ones. Which is probably why they make a distinction between PDs and mental illness. I say people like my ex are crazy, but really they just operate at a different level than the rest of us. What we label abusive behavior, could be seen (from an evolutionary standpoint) as a necessity.

        Logistically, it’s impossible to keep these people in check. But the fact that we wait until someone’s either in the hospital (suicide attempt) or wait until they are imprisoned, seems like we are letting people fall through the cracks. There must be a middle ground. I’m not suggesting we need to lock people up. I’m suggesting that we need to make mental health a real issue.

  10. savorydish said

    What I’m really saying is this- All it takes is one bad apple.

    • Evan said

      Ok there’s few topics there. Asylums over the centuries were god awful places where there was little treatment, mostly high walls. Treatment for illnesses like schizophrenia advanced over the years, medication helped and they could function much better. The families and friends of those inside the asylums petioned furiously for them to be shut and better methods to be used to treat ppl with mental illnesses and disorders. They won on the first point but got next to nothing on the second. Then lots of homeless ppl started appearing everywhere.

      Mental Illnesses vs PDs. There’s no definitive evidence explaining any of them. We just don’t understand enough about the science of it yet. Genes. Trauma. Illicit drugs. Upbringing. Life experience. The only thing that most doctors and researchers agree on is that all of them are a mix of nature and nuture. To differing degrees. Because they can see illnesses and disorders being handed down through the family line. Sometimes missing a generation, sometimes missing several, sometimes all at once. Ive read some ppl say, well look the mother has BPD, and now her son has it, they’re a dysfunctional family. It could be a dysfunctional family. They could both have it because they share the genes, and be dysfunctional because they have untreated BPD, and the family dynamic isn’t healthy. Much smarter ppl then me are scratching their heads over all this.

      As for preventing ppl with BPD or any other disorder, or mental illness, causing harm in society. Break the law, go to prison. Want to look somewhere there are plenty of ppl with mental health problems? Go to a prison. If someone with a mental health problem has a breakdown or suicide attempt, they go to hospital. And there are rafters of laws so this can be done involuntarily. Want to improve mental health? Push the govt to spend more money on the health system. The more you spend the less damage you’ll see in society. And the individual with the mental health issue will live more of a normal, happy life. And guess what, the extra money we spent on health comes back to society in the form of taxes gathered from healthier ppl who got jobs.

      Better education. For those who don’t know what’s wrong, whether that be depression, bipolar or BPD. And just as importantly for the rest of society for many many reasons. Better facilities. Making treatment affordable to everyone. End rant phew

  11. savorydish said

    Also bad behavior doesn’t constitute a disorder. But a pattern of bad behavior does. I think I’ve also made that clear.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: