Suicidal Tendencies and the Holidays

December 24, 2010

I hate to bring bad news on Xmas Eve, but I just read that Skye has been admitted into the hospital again for an attempted suicide:

I’m in the hospital. I overdosed on Lithium. My levels were critical and I’ll be here at least a few days. We’ll see what happens…

For someone who is struggling with depression, the holidays can be brutal. Skye has also been struggling with her marriage and her borderline personality disorder.

For those of you who think marriage is a solution to your BPD woes, I want you to take a good look at what marriage is like when you have BPD. No offense to Skye, but she would be the first one to tell you it is hell on earth. If you think all your issues will disappear once you have secured a partner for life, you are kidding yourself. All the issues that you have now (depression, insecurities, mood swings, lack of trust, fear of intimacy, feeling trapped etc.) will only become worse when you are in a marriage. This is not an opinion. It is a fact that all BPs must face.

Thank goodness, Skye had the self-awareness to seek help. If you are an untreated BP, you need to avoid intimate relationships until you are better. Otherwise, you are just bringing other people (a husband/wife, children, and another family) into your misery. You are adding to the problem instead of finding a real solution. Marriage is not a band-aid or a crutch to get you through life. And treating it as such is a sign that you are more troubled than you think. Suicide attempts are just one of the f-d up ways BPs react to intimacy and the fear of abandonment that comes with it.

Don’t think, “Oh, this would never happen to me”. If you have a history of chaotic relationships, self-destructive behavior, suicide ideation, cutting, etc., this can happen to you. Let this be a wake up call. Let other BPs be a mirror into your own soul. Their story is your story. Learn from these stories.

4 Responses to “Suicidal Tendencies and the Holidays”

  1. skyeee said

    I absolutely agree. Do I regret getting married ? Not a chance in Hell, but I wish I would have sought help sooner, I just didn’t even realize what was debilitating me. Not many husbands are as understanding as mine and thankfully, my children haven’t shown any affects.

    • savorydish said

      Well, you didn’t know about BPD until after you got married. The important thing is you’re getting help now, which means you have a chance at saving your marriage. I hope more people will follow your example.

      • Driver said

        @SD…how is Skyeee doing these days? I’m still playing “catch up” on reading some of the older articles but I have noticed that her blog is down (check your blogroll?).

        As always, thanks.

      • savorydish said

        I hope she is doing well. She has disappeared of the face of the internet. I hope that means she is focusing on treatment.

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