Disproportionate Anger. Where Did That Come From?

July 12, 2010

Have you ever had someone go bezerker on you over something small? And you think to yourself, “Where did that come from?” Well, most likely it came from the past. Sometimes it comes from the recent past, but it can also come from anger stored up over a lifetime. When people are reluctant to be honest about their anger, they let it bubble underneath. But when the bubbles have reached maximum occupancy, all it takes is a nudge and it all comes out at once.

How to Deal with Someone with Anger Issues.

5 Responses to “Disproportionate Anger. Where Did That Come From?”

  1. Good word here. I just stumbled upon your blog. I write about dealing with anger a lot in my blog posts. I write not from a professional standpoint but only as one who has lived it, experienced it and now as an older adult, trying to understand it and handle constructively.

    • lori said

      i live it. daily. i walk on eggshells, so as not to cause an eruption. i am never allowed to have a normal range of emotions. if i am anything less than a giggling fool, he gets furious. if i disagree with him about mundane matters, where to go out to eat, whether or not i liked a movie, i may or may not agree with a particular politician. all these things should just be part of a normal discussion, but the very quickly turn explosive if our opinions differ. my kids college majors, anything to do with our finances is off limits. he picks out our appliances, paint colors, bedspread, plants for the yard, you name it. if i like something he will automatically disagree and disagree violently. its just insane to live like this.

      • savorydish said

        Dear Lori,
        You shouldn’t have to live like this. This is abuse. You deserve better. The emotionally unstable expect us to tippy-toe around them. That is nonsense. Get yourself out of this relationship if you can. Good luck and thanks for sharing your story.

  2. Karen Kaul said

    I am one who frequently over reacts with delayed anger. I don’t want people to “leave me.” Help.

    • savorydish said

      Hey Karen,
      I can’t help you but there are trained professionals who can. The fact that you are looking for help is a good sign. It means you are aware of your condition. And that is a huge plus. Disproportionate anger is a sign that you need to deal with some issues from the past. Let your loved ones know that you are working on that and then work, work, work. If they will truly love you, they will stand by your side. But the onus is on you to change. Don’t expect them to stay if you don’t. Good luck and be well.

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